Praise Him in the hallway

Sometimes things don't turn out the way we plan or the way we would like them to. And that is okay.

"Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21

This is a concept that I am trying to put into practice in my own life. I am the type of person who gets bored very quickly. I need a challenge and if I don't have it or if I get too complacent with something, I'm ready to head out on the next adventure. So many people have said, right now in my life is the best time for me to go out and do things, see things and explore before a husband, house, or babies tether me down. That is something I want to do. I want to travel. I want to do things that I will only be able to do easily in this period of life. I want to meet new people and go on solo adventures.

These things are not happening for me right now and I am frustrated to say the least.

Recently I thought one adventure was coming to a close. It's the kind of closing that most people dread, but I was hoping for it. I knew it would free me and force me out of the comfort zone I have been living in for about 2 years now.

But it didn't close.

Anyone else would have been thankful. I was pretty bummed. I hoped it would be my golden opportunity to take a risk and make a big life move, but that is not in the plans right now I guess.

I have to come to terms with the fact that my plans are not God's plans. No matter how well planned out my plans might be, I am not in control. Most days it is a comfort to know that I am not in control, but lately it has felt more like a burden than a blessing. I find myself striving in vain for some kind of control in my life.

I heard a quote (I don't know where it came from exactly) that said "If God doesn't open another door, praise Him in the hallway. I feel like that's where I'm living. It seems like I have been camped out in the hallway of life for a very long time now, just waiting for a door to open, even just a crack. I don't know what that door will lead to, but I have to believe that when it is the right time, a door will open.

So every time I walk down the hallway that leads to my bedroom I think to myself, "Praise Him in the hallway. Praise Him in the hallway. Praise Him in the hallway." It's a little mantra I have started in my head.

"To humans belong the plans of the heart, but from the Lord comes the proper answer of the tongue." Proverbs 16:1

"The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." Proverbs 16:9

"If men devise their way, so as to make God’s glory their end and his will their rule, they may expect that he will direct their steps by his Spirit and grace, so that they shall not miss their way nor come short of their end. But let men devise their worldly affairs ever so politely, and with ever so great a probability of success, yet God has the ordering of the event, and sometimes directs their steps to that which they least intended. The design of this is to teach us to say, If the Lord will, we shall live and do this or that (Jam. 4:14, Jam. 4:15), and to have our eye to God, not only in the great turns of our lives, but in every step we take. Lord, direct my way, 1 Th. 3:11." Matthew Henry Commentary of Prov. 16:9

Let your heart take courage

Psalm 27:14 says: "Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"

My niece often asks me why there are sticky notes on my nightstand, on the back of my chair, sometimes stuck to the back of my cellphone, and on my bathroom mirror. While her bedroom walls are lined with posters of Justin Beiber and a sign that says "no boys alowd", mine are plastered with words of encouragement, sticky notes with important verses, quotes from my favorite people and lines of poetry or lines from my favorite books. I love words. Ever since I was reading Beverly Cleary and JK Rowling I have always found written words to be more powerful than spoken words. I tried to explain to her that they were important words that I like to be reminded of whenever I look around, but I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm a little crazy!

Psalm 27:14 is written on a sticky note on my nightstand. Every night I plug in my phone to charge and read these words before I lay my phone on the sticky note for the night. And every morning when my alarm goes off and I am blindly reaching for the snooze button, my fingers run across the green note and I am reminded to wait on the Lord.

Waiting is really hard!

If I went back through my past blog posts and tried to find a common theme, I would be willing to bet it would be the concept of waiting on the Lord. Sometimes I think that this period of my life is the only time I will have to "wait", but life is all about waiting on the Lord. In high school, I was waiting and biding my time wishing I was in college. In college I was waiting for adulthood. And now I wait for a husband or whatever God may have lined up next. And I can imagine that as I progress through the years to come I will again be asked to wait. I will wait for the right time to have children. I will wait for them to be old enough to start school. I will wait for their marriages. I will wait for retirement. And I could go on.

In the last few months I have been praying for God to reveal what it is I'm supposed to be doing now, because I feel like I'm just sitting around waiting for life to begin. I want to learn, I want to grow, I want to experience all that my life has to offer me, but I feel stuck. Where am I supposed to be in life? I worry that I am missing it, overlooking something that God is pushing me toward. But I had a revelation this morning as my eyes wandered to that sticky note on my nightstand. What if I am so busy worrying about what is to come, or what I'm supposed to be doing, that I am missing out on what He is actually trying to teach me: TO WAIT!

I looked up the word "wait" in the dictionary (because I love to know exactly what words mean!) and found a few different definitions that I don't usually associate with waiting.

to be available or in readiness; to look forward to eagerly

I usually think about waiting in terms of being inactive or neglected in some way. But if I redefine waiting, I can see that an army is trained and ready to spring into action at any time, but until they are needed, they wait, they continue to train and get stronger in the process of waiting. People wait eagerly and passionately, clearing the way for whatever it is they are expecting. 

From now on, I want to learn to actively wait. I want to wait in readiness of whatever it is God is preparing. I want to use this time to strengthen myself, using the challenge of learning to wait patiently as a stepping stone to a great future that is ahead of me. I will remember that waiting is an essential part of life, because if we all got exactly what we wanted at the exact moment we first began to want it, we would be like a spoiled child who has never learned what it takes to survive this life. 

The name of the game is WAITING and I am learning to embrace it. 

Ten truths for a weary soul

I wanted to make a list of some of the most basic truths that I am clinging to right now. Things seem so topsy-turvy in my world and I have to hold on as tight as I can to things that I know to be true.

1. God is still God
   ~ He is Almighty, All-Powerful, All-Knowing, Loving, and In Control of EVERYTHING

2. If something is in God's plan, there is nothing on earth (or anywhere else) that can stop that from happening
   ~ He is in control (as previously stated!) and no scheme of man or devil can shake that control

3. He knows what He is doing
   ~ Whether He says yes or no, opens doors or locks them and throws away the key, He makes no mistakes.

4. He has my best interest at heart
   ~ God wants what is best for me and He won't just leave me in a bind to figure it out on my own. He also won't put me in the wrong situation. He wants good things for His children.

5. There is a reason for everything, even when I don't understand
   ~ There are many times when God steers me in a different direction than I would expect and I find myself crying out to God because I don't understand what He is doing. But He sees all things and I do not.

6. He has a plan for my life
   ~ Jeremiah 29:11 is my proof

7. God has blessed me more than I seem to remember
   ~ When I get frustrated and don't see the good in my life, I am reminded that I live in a great country where I can work and make money and I am not in slavery or oppression. I sleep in a warm bed in a safe home. I have food in the fridge and clothes on my back. I can go to church and read my Bible in public without the risk of persecution. I don't have any right to complain.

8. I can always rely on Him
   ~ Even in periods when God seems silent in my life, I know that He is always with me and watching over me.

9. God will provide for all of my needs
   ~ Even though sometimes it doesn't seem like it, looking back, there has never been a time when I have gone without something I needed. God always provides in some way, maybe not the way I expected, but He provides.

10. Jesus loves me
   ~ I may not know how to receive it, and may not always feel it, but if He was willing to die an awful death for me it is clear that He loves me.

What truth is God speaking to you today?

God asks strange things sometimes

This week has been an interesting one. I got paid on Friday, had a doctor's appointment for new glasses right after work and was planning a night in with take out. I have been trying to become a grown up, which is not all it's cracked up to be, so I got a rude awakening when I found that my appointment would cost me $270. Needless to say I was in shock. I knew it was expensive, but that number was not anywhere near what I was expecting. And for so many reasons (and not many of them good reasons) I burst into tears sitting in the optical chair. The lady didn't know what to do with me. I have gone there all my life, and the lady helping me is a member of my church, but she just sat there not quite knowing what happened or how to help.

While at work earlier, I bought Groupons for me and a friend to get our nails done for our birthdays. We were born 2 weeks apart and have been friends since we were in preschool and we wanted to do something special this year since we are turning 25. I had spent $70 on that. So between that, the glasses, and rent due this week I knew that I would be more broke than I have been in a long time.

There is nothing that stresses me out more than money, or more specifically, the lack of money. I went home and cried out to God. I didn't know what to do or how I was going to get through the 2 weeks until my next payday with $30 to my name without gas, food, or anything else. It is a terrible feeling to be broke on payday.

I emailed the people at Groupon asking if there was a way I could return the unused purchase. There policy is that within 7 days you have the option to return it. I got an email back from a person named Arlo C. who said he would give me a credit for my purchases on my Groupon account. I was thankful for that, but I needed the money, not a credit. I prayed that God would work some miracle out on my behalf and emailed Arlo back asking if there was any way I could get the money back on my card instead.

I was early for my friends birthday dinner and for some weird reason I pulled into Starbucks. I had a mental battle with myself about how I did not have the money for coffee, and almost turned around and left. But for some reason I stayed in line at the drive thru. I ordered a small drink and pulled around to the window. As I sat next in line, I noted a car pull up behind me. I felt God tug at my heart telling me to pay for her drink as well. I was confused. I had barely any money to begin with, and now he was asking me to pay for someone else's drink to? What if she is buying drinks for a bunch of people? I thought. I felt like God just sort of shrugged his shoulders and said "Oh well, do it anyway." As I pulled up to the window I was still battling. I handed the barista my money and said "I would like to pay for the next person's drink too" she smiled and nodded. I couldn't even tell you how much her drink was, but I was glad it seemed like I wasn't buying 10 people's drinks!

As I drove away I felt peace, not confusion and stress.

When I got to the dinner, still early, I sat in my car and checked my email on the off chance that Arlo had responded. And he had. I opened his email and read "Hi Ashley, No problem. I just issued a full refund back to your credit card you used for this purchase instead." I truly believe that God was checking to see if I would be faithful to what he asked me to do, and he was faithful to what he says. He is Provider. He cares about our concerns.

And on top of that, my optical bill went from $270 down to $188! Praise God!

Moral of the story: when God asks you to do something, do it, no matter how crazy it may sound!

I'm selfish

Sometimes I am shamefully unaware of how selfish I am.

I like to think that I am usually pretty conscious of people and do my best to offer what I can to those in need. I try to pay attention to what is going on in people's lives and reach out when they need a friend. I realized this weekend how much I fail in that area. It's not a fun realization to have, but it is so necessary.

On Friday I went to a young adult event. I haven't been there in a long time, but a friend asked me to go with her so I said yes. I know a lot of the people that were there, but was sticking with a few people that I am closest to. Out of nowhere I walked by a girl that I have only met a few times who was sitting alone at a table. There were other people at the table, but each was engrossed in their own separate conversations. I was on my way to check out the food selection when God sort of tapped me on the shoulder and told me to sit down next to her.

I'm a friendly person, so this isn't uncommon for me to do, but I really wanted to get something to eat, and I had been following a friend over to the food table. I didn't really want to abandon her and sit down and strike up a conversation with someone I barely knew. But I did it anyway. And I am so glad I did!
She expressed to me how out of place and unwanted she felt. I could see her frustration and anxiety over the whole situation and I was immediately so grateful I had listened when God told me she needed a friend. She was telling me things that I, myself feel on a regular basis, and I wish someone would sit down next to me and just listen and encourage me.

I didn't want to put my desires on the back burner. I wanted to get a plate of food and sit down with a group of my close friends and not have to try. Not have to struggle to come up with something to say when I feel uncomfortable. Not have to step out of my comfort zone. Not have to feel burdened for someone else. Not have to feel the weight of her anxiety. Listening to God's gentle nudgings doesn't always sound appealing, but they are always used by God to do great things.

The girl I had sat down with later came and sat with me during worship and the service. I know that I didn't do anything extraordinary, I just listened when God said someone needed someone to care about them right then. But what about the times that I don't listen? Who have I refused to care about because my desires or needs were more important than theirs? What could have been accomplished if I had simply sat down next to someone who needed a friend for a few minutes?

So grateful

Here is more information about my trip, what we will be doing while there, and some specifics of how to support me if you feel so led. As usual, no pressure. I just want to give those who are interested the ability to do so. 

As you may have heard, Durban, South Africa has one of the highest numbers of AIDS cases in the world; it’s a place where more than 35 people die of AIDS every hour. This horrific epidemic leaves behind 3 to 6 million orphans. Can you envision a land where one in every five children is HIV positive? We are making the trip to Key of Hope, an organization that is working in Durban giving the children of this epidemic hope, by spreading the Gospel and providing food, medicine, and education for the underprivileged.

The date of the trip is July 25th through August 3rd, 2013, at an approximate cost of $4000. I am personally excited about the opportunity to serve and to minister and would be thrilled if you would partner with me. You will receive regular updates and pictures of all that God accomplishes before, during and after the trip.

If you are unable to give financially, remember your prayers are equally as important as I
begin to plan my trip with the team. I am confident that if it is the Lord’s will that I make this trip; then He will provide a way.

While in South Africa, I will have the opportunity to:

• Work in squatter camps bringing the life changing love of God through Gospel teaching, music and sports programs
• Build daycare shelters in the camps giving the children a safe environment as they receive the resources and training through Key of Hope
• Be changed myself as we spend time ministering to children that have much less than myself

If you are interested in helping, please send in your check payable to The River Church, 8393
East Holly Rd. Holly, MI. 48442 (Please note “Durban” along with my name "Ashley Young" in the
memo line).

Thank you all so much for even reading this blog. I understand that money is tight for many people and being asked to give can be a burden. All I ask is that you consider it. If you cannot give, I completely understand! Just your prayers and encouragement are greatly appreciated.

I don't like math!

Math was never my favorite subject. I barely passed it in high school. Had to take it more than once in college. And avoid doing mental math as much as possible. I have a friend who loves math, and I just don't understand the appeal!

The same is true when it comes to raising money for a mission trip.

My first financial deadline for the trip is January 15. I have to have $2,500 by then. Considering that it is only September, that deadline didn't really scare me too much. January seems so far away. By then we will have trick or treated, stuffed ourselves on turkey, celebrated my 25th birthday, celebrated the birth of Jesus, will ring in a new year, and I will have been reunited with a great friend in the south! There seems to be so much time.

And then my sister did the math for me... "that means you need $500 a month if you start right now." Isn't she so helpful... $2,500 five months from now sounds a lot more doable than $500 a month starting now. That number scares me! I know that I have a God who is a provider. I know that he will come through some how. But my finite, human brain cannot fathom that working out.

Please know that this post was not meant to guilt anyone into donating money to my trip. If you feel, after much prayer and consideration, that God is telling you to do that I would be so grateful. However, this post was only meant to document my humanity in contrast to God's sovereignty in all things.

So all I will ask is that you pray. Pray that God will come through and be everything that he promises to be. Pray that the people who are meant to give will listen to God speaking in their life and be obedient. Pray that I would find peace in knowing that the Creator of the entire universe has me in the palm of his hand.

Putting life on hold is not a suitable option

Growing up near railroad tracks has given me a healthy respect for a common metaphor of life. If we continue to move forward, taking the next visible step, we are good. It is when we sit down and refuse to progress that the train comes. {I may have reworked that a bit, but you get the point!} I have also heard, and truly believe, that we do not need to see the whole staircase, we just need to see the next step.

So often I want to jump five steps ahead and have the ability to see into the future. I desperately want to know what my future looks like. I want to know where I'll be in five years {especially when so many people have been asking and I don't have an answer for them!} I want to know what state or city. I want to know what kind of career I'll have. Who I will marry and when. How many kids I will have. So many things. I'm a bit of a planner. I like to have a general idea of how my days, weeks, months, and sometimes years will look. I like to be doing something, so I need to know where I can fill in the gaps.

I have this date in mind that I hope something special will happen on. Only God knows if that is the case or not though. It drives me a little crazy sometimes thinking about the future and subconsciously planning around that date. I have recognized that I need to stop this mind set at once. God has perfect timing, so if that date is supposed to be open, it will be. I don't have to plan. I don't have to drive myself insane thinking about it and planning around it. In fact, if that day comes I would hope that the people involved would respect me even more for having acted on faith and gone about my life following God instead of putting everything on hold.

Recently I was listening to a friend and mentor talk about a mission trip that she is planning for the ladies of my church. I've known about the trip for a while now. I have seen the facebook messages about the meetings, I have heard people talk about it, I have not been blind to it. Never before did I have any desire to go. Not that I am disinterested in missions. In fact I have enjoyed the opportunities I have taken. But nothing inside me was saying that I should consider going and I was fine with that. Last night something changed. I was listening to her speak and tears welled up in my eyes. Don't get me wrong, I am a crier, so that is nothing new, but this was something else. I couldn't shake the sense that I needed more information.

So now I am praying about the possibility of going to South Africa July 2013. That is huge for me. I remember vividly a conversation I had with my father a few years ago. I mentioned something about a mission trip to Africa that I had heard about and he immediately, said I was absolutely not allowed to go. My dad was a cop my whole life up until a few years ago when he retired. Because of his time on the force I was raised in a protected home. I was not sheltered by any means, but I was always watched out for and made aware of the terrible things that happen every day, just in the US. I know the thoughts that went through his head when I mentioned going to Africa, a country with no stable governments, guerrilla warfare, an AIDS epidemic, and some of the deepest poverty of our world. I know the fears of his little girl never making it out of Africa. And I'm not saying he's wrong to think that. It's a real danger.

I was nervous to tell him that I was considering it. I expected the same response I got a few years ago. When I did tell him, his answer was nothing if not straight out of the mouth of God. "Okay" was all he said.

So in considering this opportunity, my mind landed on that date that I have subconsciously been planning around. It would be about a month before leaving for Africa. My mind immediately retracted and said to my heart, "Nope. Not gonna happen. Never mind. Forget that." When I recognized that ridiculous thought and was able to analyze it, I came to one conclusion. If God wants me to go to Africa, he will make a way no matter what I say. Why am I planning a huge God adventure around a silly date that may or may not happen? I cannot put my life on hold for something like that. There are times when we should step out in faith and hold fast to something that God has given us, but I don't believe this is one of those things. I think it is much more important to go on about what God wants me to do, instead of putting life on hold and sitting down on the train tracks waiting to be run over.

I'm frustrated with what we call "church"

I have been in church pretty much every Sunday since I was born. I have gone to different kinds of churches in different places. I have experienced worship and sermons from various people and places. I have gone to camps and conferences and revivals and mission trips. And I spent 15 months as an intern at a church. I guess you could say I have a lot of experience with church. I'm no expert, but I think I can speak from what experience I have had.

About a year ago I found myself serving in ministry 6 out of 7 days most weeks, sometimes more. On top of attending church on Sundays (both services my church offered) I was helping in the nursery, leading a middle school girls' small group, involved in young adult ministry, attending the young adult small group, helping at youth group, serving at the Saturday Night service, and so much more that I can't even begin to list here. At one point I stopped and thought "Why am I doing all of this?" I wasn't doing all these things to worship God or grow closer to Jesus, I was doing them largely due to routine and appearances. I was warn thin and my personal life was beginning to show it. My life was showing signs of unraveling at the seams. After wading through this dilemma within me, I realized that I had to choose between my sanity and the ministries I was serving in. I had to step away from some things I was involved in.

When I began to step away from things there was some tension. People questioned my walk with God. They gossiped about what was wrong with me or how I was living my life. I tried to ignore the things I heard about myself that were not true, but it's not always easy.

Now I am again re-evaluating the ministries I am involved in. There have been things going on that I don't agree with. For the most part they aren't big, ministry ending things, but they are important none the less. There seems to be a huge focus on planning and recognition that I have noticed and a lack of being the hands and feet of Jesus here on earth. We are called to love people, not plan events to get people involved. Follow where the Spirit leads, not forge our own path. Give over control of our lives and our ministries, not be as involved as possible in everything. If we love people, God will bring the increase. And without the love of Christ running through us the people that come to that perfectly planned event will not want to come back. When we follow where the Spirit is leading us, we don't have to go through the hassle of cutting a new path and risk the peril lying ahead. And it is impossible to give 100% when we are trying to divide our time and energy into too many things.

The American church has it all wrong.

I look to the mission fields around the world for the true meaning of what Jesus is all about. They don't have beautiful, clean and fancy church buildings, they take the gospel to the city streets where the homeless need a true Savior. They go to the orphanages where the children need a Father. They give food and clothes and basic necessities to the needy who need to know the Provider. They go to the shut ins and widows who need a Lover. They provide medical care to those who need a Healer.

What are we doing to show the world the Jesus we serve and what He can do? It's not about people knowing our names or a perfectly executed event at church, it's about loving people. Even if it's not the homeless or orphans we can reach, there are still lost and dying people all around us, literally, that need to know Jesus. I want to challenge you to break the mindset of many churches and truly love people the way Jesus did.

The importance of time with our Father

If you ask me, yeah I pray and I read my Bible, and I go to church every Sunday. I enjoy spending time with God, but I know that I don't do it as much as I should. I blame it on my life being busy serving or spending time with my family or work or anything else I fill my day with. But when it comes down to it, I make time to scroll through my news feed on Facebook, I rarely miss my shows on TV and I spend a lot of time in my car just singing to the radio or yelling at traffic! Those are not bad things in and of themselves, but it is time that I could be devoting to following Jesus, to talking to Him or to reading what He says.

This morning I decided that when my alarm went off at 5:50 I was going to get up and spend some time with God instead of hitting snooze repeatedly! So when I heard it start I hesitantly got up and began a mental complaint about the early hour. God was quick to remind me that it is the least I can do for the One who created me and loves me! I slowly did a few small morning tasks, made coffee and went to sit outside with my Bible in hand. It was {surprisingly} an absolutely gorgeous morning! The sun hadn't quite peaked over the trees that surround my neighborhood and it was already warm enough but not too hot outside! Almost immediately I was so grateful that I had dragged my butt out of bed kicking and screaming because it was so wonderful!

I read a couple chapters in Isaiah and thanked God for creating such beautiful things while sipping my coffee! No one else in my house was awake yet, and it didn't seem like my neighbors were either, so it was just me and God and the nature that He created! It was so peaceful! I rarely make time for this and I now know what I am missing out on! My mood was lifted and the world was put back into perspective for me again. I have a tendency to focus on the problems right in front of my face, instead of looking around and seeing the blessings that are just beyond my focus.

I want to challenge you to wake up a little earlier than you have to just to be able to spend some time admiring what God has created. He didn't have to make the things in nature so beautiful, but I believe He did it to remind us of His attention to detail and His desire for us to recognize His beauty! I think from now on my alarm will be set a bit earlier just so I can sit in His creation and remember what He has done for me.

Dreams

Let me start out by saying that I really do like my job! I know that God has placed me here for this time in my life and I am so thankful for it! However, I woke up earlier than necessary this morning dreading going to work. It is not the first time either. I know part of it is that I am not a morning person, so getting up early enough to be showered and ready to work at 8 am is not appealing to me at all, but that is not the only reason.

I enjoy what I do most days, but I sit at a computer in a cubicle and don't have much interaction with any people except the customers that call to complain. {And God has blessed me with this weird ability to talk to people who are upset that I didn't know I had until this job!} But I was not built to sit here and answer the phone and do mindless tasks for the rest of my life. I know that I am here for a reason in this time of my life, but I find myself praying more and more that this time would be ending soon and I will be able to become what I was built for very soon.

I believe that God gives us dreams so we won't get stuck in a rut with where He has asked us to be right now. He wants us to know that there is something ahead of us so we don't get too caught up in where we are now. I have big dreams! They terrify me most days because I know that I cannot accomplish these dreams in my own power and I don't like that! I like to be in control of things, or at least feel like I am in control. But with God leading my life, I don't have control and honestly I don't want to have control. If I had control of the direction of my life I would have messed it up big time already. But I have a God who wants to unfold His plan for me at opportune times so I have the courage to stick out today and the excitement to seek out what tomorrow will bring.

As much as I want my dreams to come true right now, I know that it is not possible right now and I am ok with that. I would love to have them come true in the next 11 months, but I will wait as long as it takes for the divine plan to fall together for me. I would rather wait for 100 years for what is right for me than to have something good enough right now.

What dreams has God given you? Are you strong enough to hold on until they come true?

Pray for the girls of Cabin 2

I just got back from a full week of camp with the teens from my church! This is the first year that I have been able to go as a counselor and I was nervous. I was praying that God would give me an easy group of girls to lead. I prayed he would hand pick them just for me and my co-counselor Bethany. I prayed that we would get along and no one would cause problems. I even prayed for my cabin to be filled with "church girls", the ones that have grown up in church and have gone to camp most of their lives and know the drill.

I ended up getting a mixture of a few church girls and some unchurched girls. I was nervous that they would not get along and I would be breaking up fights and counseling them on the necessity to be nice and get along. We had no issues! They were good girls! They stayed in the cabin when I asked them to, they were quiet (for the most part) when I asked them to be, and they got along and encouraged each other! Praise God!!!

I found that it was the unchurched girls that I fell in love with the most. They are so real and straight forward. They have questions and aren't afraid or too proud to ask them. They have struggles in their lives that I have never known and they need a real God to rescue them.

Please pray for them: Hannah, Madison, Lauren, Amanda S., Adrianna, Sydney, Lore, Raven, Rainie, Shelby, Amanda D., Kaylee, and Genasys. And of course my co-counselor Bethany! But especially Genasys. She broke my heart and really needs to know a real Jesus to show her that her Heavenly Father loves her, even though her earthly father and step-father are not what they should be.

What is He doing up stream?

"God will silently plan for you,
His purpose will all unfold;
Your tangled life will shine at last
A masterpiece of skill untold."

I'm not sure who said these words, but I know they speak truth into my life! I am a masterpiece at the hands of an almighty and loving God. We may not see God working right now, but He is always there.
I love to relate this to the story of Moses and the Israelites as they escaped from Egypt. God split the Red Sea and all of the people walked across the floor of the sea and it was dry! That sounds all well and good to a kid in Sunday School, but when you really think about the reality of that, it is unfathomable! The water had to be somewhere right? God was working up stream to stop the water. And what about all of the creatures in the water? Where did they go? God was working up stream. Can you imagine being up stream and seeing the water backing up and wondering what was going on? They were probably so confused by it all. What if it had been a dry time and all of a sudden, the banks were being overflowed and the water just continued to rise?

God works up stream! We can't tell what's going on when we're standing on the banks of the Red Sea staring into the deep water, until all of a sudden the water parts, taking the fish and the weeds and the waves with it. You tentatively dip your toe in and test the ground and it is completely dry, just waiting for you to take the first step into the river bed.

Is God asking you to take that first step into the river bed and trust that He has orchestrated everything you will need up stream? Are you willing to step in and trust what He says?

What a 6 year old taught me about obedience!

I learn a lot of truth about life through interacting with my niece and nephew. This weekend me, my mom and niece and nephew had to run to a store for somethings that we needed. We had a small window of time to get things done and some uncooperative kiddos! We stopped at our house to get something that had to be exchanged and my niece started whining. {Nothing new! She's a very, I'll say, spirited child!} She was whining because she didn't want to go to the store, she just wanted to stay home and play with the neighbor girl. I was trying to explain to her that she didn't really have an option because she was too young to stay home alone and we had to go right then. As you can imagine, that didn't make things any better in her 6 year old mind. But at the end of the day, she really didn't have an option. There was something that we had to do and a specific time we had to do it, and she had to go. End of discussion. And when she got to pick out a toy at the store for being good {once we got there}, she thought she was the coolest thing since sliced bread and it made it all worth it!

How often do I whine and complain when God tells me what I need to do right then? How often do I try to avoid the conversations with strangers that He wants me start? When the Creator of the Universe says "jump" do I respond with "how high" or with "but I want to do this instead"? How does that work out for me? It works out about as well as it did for my niece this weekend! It works out about as well as it did for Jonah in the Bible when God told him to go to Nineveh.

Jonah 1:1-4, 11-17
The Lord’s word came to Jonah, Amittai’s son: “Get up and go to Nineveh, that great city, and cry out against it, for their evil has come to my attention.” So Jonah got up—to flee to Tarshish from the Lord! He went down to Joppa and found a ship headed for Tarshish. He paid the fare and went aboard to go with them to Tarshish, away from the Lord. But the Lord hurled a great wind upon the sea, so that there was a great storm on the sea; the ship looked like it might be broken to pieces.

They said to him, “What will we do about you so that the sea will become calm around us?” (The sea was continuing to rage.) He said to them, “Pick me up and hurl me into the sea! Then the sea will become calm around you. I know it’s my fault that this great storm has come upon you.” The men rowed to reach dry land, but they couldn’t manage it because the sea continued to rage against them. So they called on the Lord, saying, “Please, Lord, don’t let us perish on account of this man’s life, and don’t blame us for innocent blood! You are the Lord: whatever you want, you can do.” Then they picked up Jonah and hurled him into the sea, and the sea ceased its raging. The men worshipped the Lord with a profound reverence; they offered a sacrifice to the Lord and made solemn promises. Meanwhile, the Lord provided a great fish to swallow Jonah. Jonah was in the belly of the fish for three days and three nights.

Jonah didn't want to go to Nineveh. He had other plans. He wanted to stay where it was safe and comfortable. But God had bigger plans for him and Jonah's disobedience forced God to teach him a lesson. So Jonah spent 3 days inside a big fish and then was vomited out on shore. That sounds like a great way to spend a 3 day weekend! 

When we complain about what God is asking us to do and instead of doing it we give God our list of things we want to do, we are like a child that doesn't know what is good for them. I should know better, but I fail most days. When God tells me to speak, I remain silent. When God tells me to go, I prefer to stay. When He directs my path, I try to veer off the trail. I need to do better. Because, like I learned from my niece's episode, when we are obedient we are seen by a God who can bless us with more than a trinket from a department store!

Link up to
 

More like her

I decided at the beginning of the summer that I wanted to learn more about the women of the Bible on my own. Admittedly, I haven't sought out information about the matriarchs of the Bible before, and boy oh boy was I in for a treat!

I think I was most curious about these women because of the way my family is shaped. We do not have patriarchs, we have matriarchs. My grandfathers died before I was born, so I was loved by my grandmothers. I don't have many uncles, but a ton of aunts. And many of my cousins that are close to my age are female. Even in my own immediate family it is the same. My dad is more hands off so my mom is the one involved in the daily goings on of the family. The same is true of my niece and nephew's father. He works afternoons and doesn't play as big of a role in the daily life of his children. 

I didn't exactly go about things in an orderly fashion, just tried to follow where the Spirit led me.

I have studied Lydia, Rebekah, Sarah, Hagar, the Proverbs 31 woman, Rahab, Gomer, Job's wife, Hannah, Samson's mother, Delilah, and Tamar.

I have really enjoyed learning about these women. They all have the most interesting stories and play such huge parts in the stories that were so familiar to me from my years in Christian school and church, but I never realized it! Sermons tend to center on the men of the Bible that do great things. But what about the women that were holding down the fort, encouraging, shaping, loving, molding, and raising these men? Samuel would never have lived to do great things if Hannah had not prayed and wept and trusted God for him. There are 3 women named in the lineage of Christ, that's important! Men were able to rise above the others because of the women they could trust to manage their homes. Women opened their homes to disciples and cared for them. Or hid spies in her country to protect them from the wrath (based in fear) of the armies of her country. Men were tempted by these women too. They fell to their deception and even lusted after their beauty. They were raised by incredible women and raised sweet little girls to become incredible women.

I want to be more like these women and learn from these women. They have valuable things to teach us. I want to have faith like Hannah, and be strong like Lydia, and fearless like Rahab. I want to be blessed like Sarah, and obedient like Ruth. And I also want to learn from the women like Delilah and Potiphar's wife. And learn to protect myself from Bathsheba's story. I want to learn to trust God from the distrust of the wife of Job. And remember to put God first from the story of Gomer. But most of all, I want to be a willing servant like Rebekah.

I read this quote from a website about Rebekah, it said, "The godliness of Rebekah is what opened the door to her destiny. She was not complaining of her situation, but rather allowed the love of God to shape her life." She was an answer to prayer! She wasn't complaining about her lot in life, she was living in the knowledge that she was created for a greater purpose than anything she had imagined for herself. Isn't that amazing?? I want to be like that!!!

I want to strive every day to become more like the wonderful women of the Bible. The way I see it, if God put them into the Bible, there's a good chance they are there for a pretty good reason!

Who is your favorite Bible character?

A psalm of David

Psalm 29

A psalm of David.

1 You, divine beings! Give to the Lord—
    give to the Lord glory and power!
² Give to the Lord the glory due his name!
    Bow down to the Lord in holy splendor!

³ The Lord’s voice is over the waters;
    the glorious God thunders;
        the Lord is over the mighty waters.
⁴ The Lord’s voice is strong;
    the Lord’s voice is majestic.
⁵ The Lord’s voice breaks cedar trees—
    yes, the Lord shatters the cedars of Lebanon.
⁶ He makes Lebanon jump around like a young bull,
    makes Sirion jump around like a young wild ox.
⁷ The Lord’s voice unleashes fiery flames;
⁸     the Lord’s voice shakes the wilderness—
        yes, the Lord shakes the wilderness of Kadesh.
⁹ The Lord’s voice convulses the oaks,
    strips the forests bare,
        but in his temple everyone shouts, “Glory!”
¹⁰ The Lord sits enthroned over the floodwaters;
    the Lord sits enthroned—king forever!

¹¹ Let the Lord give strength to his people!
    Let the Lord bless his people with peace!

Divine Interruptions

Have you ever been walking through life just fine and then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, your life is interrupted and flipped upside down? I used to think that these were just big annoyances that got in my way and were to be moved through as quickly as possible, but I don't think that anymore. I am recognizing more and more in my own life that these interruptions are actually divine interruptions meant to make me pause and learn some things.

My life has been full of these divine interruptions lately, from my sister and 2 children moving back in with me and my parents, to a feeling of desertion from many of my friends, to letting go of a dream that I have held onto for so long. These interruptions have threatened to consume me and defeat me. But God is a gracious teacher. He hasn't let me quit yet. Just when I think I can't go another day in the chaos and I just want to hide under the covers all day, He brings me a reminder or some kind of blessing that rejuvenates my spirit and I remember that it will get better. It has to, because God would not bring me to this place to leave me here. He wouldn't be glorified in a broken mess of a person by dropping them off on the side of the road and leaving them for dead! He is glorified when we can show the world where we have been and where He has taken us from there!

I was thinking about a message I heard at the beginning of the year about divine interruptions by Beth Moore at the Passion Conference in Atlanta, Georgia. She spoke about the woman who had an issue of blood who touched Jesus' clothes and was healed immediately.

Here is the whole story from Luke 8:

Jesus heals two women

⁴¹ A man named Jairus, who was a synagogue leader, came and fell at Jesus’ feet. He pleaded with Jesus to come to his house ⁴² because his only daughter, a twelve-year-old, was dying. As Jesus moved forward, he faced smothering crowds. ⁴³ A woman was there who had been bleeding for twelve years. She had spent her entire livelihood on doctors, but no one could heal her. ⁴⁴ She came up behind him and touched the hem of his clothes, and at once her bleeding stopped. ⁴⁵ “Who touched me?” Jesus asked. When everyone denied it, Peter said, “Master, the crowds are surrounding you and pressing in on you!” ⁴⁶ But Jesus said, “Someone touched me. I know that power has gone out from me.” ⁴⁷ When the woman saw that she couldn’t escape notice, she came trembling and fell before Jesus. In front of everyone, she explained why she had touched him and how she had been immediately healed. ⁴⁸ “Daughter, your faith has healed you,” Jesus said. “Go in peace.” ⁴⁹ While Jesus was still speaking, someone came from the synagogue leader’s house, saying to Jairus, “Your daughter has died. Don’t bother the teacher any longer.” ⁵⁰ When Jesus heard this, he responded, “Don’t be afraid; just keep trusting, and she will be healed.” ⁵¹ When he came to the house, he didn’t allow anyone to enter with him except Peter, John, and James, and the child’s father and mother. ⁵² They were all crying and mourning for her, but Jesus said, “Don’t cry. She isn’t dead. She’s only sleeping.” ⁵³ They laughed at him because they knew she was dead. ⁵⁴ Taking her hand, Jesus called out, “Child, get up.” ⁵⁵ Her life returned and she got up at once. He directed them to give her something to eat. ⁵⁶ Her parents were beside themselves with joy, but he ordered them to tell no one what had happened. 

This was a Divine Interruption. Do you see it? Jesus was on his way to heal a little girl when this woman pushed her way through the crowd to touch his clothes. What's crazy to me is that Jesus FELT her touch, out of the many people that were surrounding him. This tells me that He cares about our concerns and He wants to address them. He didn't just feel the power go out from Him, He stopped and took the time to call out to the woman and bless her. That is a personal God who loves His people if I ever saw one! I believe He stopped for another reason as well. He didn't want to just care for her, He wanted to acknowledge her faith to the crowd surrounding them so they would believe as well.


Then Jesus turns His attention back to what He was on His way to do. But word comes that the little girl has died so Jesus is not needed anymore. This could have been a bad situation for the woman with the blood issue. The crowd could have easily turned on her and blamed her for interrupting Jesus on his way to save the life of a little girl. But Jesus wouldn't let that happen. Jesus can raise people from the dead, don't forget! This proves that the divine interruptions will interrupt our lives, but He won't allow them to change what He is already working toward. 


The interruptions in my life have come at a key time, and I can recognize that now. I am fast approaching a turning point in life when I will need the skills that this interruption has taught me. I have no idea what that turning point is, but I know that it isn't going to be easy. I have been learning patience and gentleness and love. Those are not things that are the most necessary qualities when facing a cake walk! Those are qualities that you need when you are walking into a struggle that will be so worth it!


What is your DIVINE INTERRUPTION? Are you learning from it or fighting it? 

Jesus LOVES me. This I KNOW!

This morning I asked God to give me a verse that I needed to hear today, and He came through in a huge way! Here is the passage He gave me:

"But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: 'Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through the fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. I give Egypt as your ransom, Cush and Seba in exchange for you. Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you, I give men in return for you, peoples in exchange for your life. Fear not, for I am with you;" Isaiah 43:1-5a

This is definitely something I needed to hear! I am so blessed that God is constantly reminding me of how much He loves me and is taking care of me. The world tries to tell us that we don't matter and we have nothing to offer, so therefore we are useless. But that is not how God feels about us. In fact, the truth is that we are loved individually and personally by the One who created the entire universe and every single thing in it.

We may find ourselves in water over our heads, but God is always with us and protecting us. And we will walk through fire from time to time, but we won't be burned up. We are PRECIOUS to God. How can we ever believe we are useless when God says right here that we are precious to Him? If that doesn't encourage your soul I am not sure what would! If the world tells you that you aren't worth its time, you can look them straight in the eye and say "I don't really care if you think I'm worth your time. I am precious in the eyes of the One who created you. So there!" {Ok maybe something a little more clever than that, but you get the picture!} He has called us BY NAME!! He knows your name! I'm fired up about this!!

For too long I have believed that little nagging whisper in my mind that says that God doesn't actually care about me, because if he did he wouldn't let these things happen to me. That he doesn't love me because he has forgotten me. After reading this passage, how can I deny his love for me? He says it clear as day more than once. If someone tells you something more than once, chances are pretty good that they really mean it!

The danger zone of service

Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. Luke 10:38-->

Most of the time we focus on the fact that Mary was sitting at the feet of Jesus in this passage. But I love the contrast between the two women, sisters who are as different as can be. It makes me think of me and my sister. My sister is tall, blonde curly hair, fair skin, and blue eyes. I am short, dark brown straight hair, slightly darker skin and dark hazel eyes. We are very different. Most people don't even think we are related when they see us together. We also think very differently. She is in the moment, free spirited, and a bit air headed at times, whereas I am thinking ahead constantly, more reserved and have my head firmly attached to my shoulders! This is the frame of reference I use when reading this story, they're different but yet somewhat alike. They have the same goal, to serve Jesus, but they go about it completely differently.

Martha wants to care for Jesus and those that were with him by making dinner and meeting their physical needs. I can see Martha in the kitchen chopping vegetables and cooking up a feast for them all, sweat beads on her forehead and her hands working diligently.
Mary, on the other hand, is more interested in sitting and worshiping Jesus, hanging on his every word. She is more focused on the emotional aspect of serving Jesus. She wants to know more about Him and what He is teaching.
Martha gets mad at her sister and comes complaining to Jesus to have Him make her help in the kitchen. Jesus lovingly corrects her and reminds her of the priorities of following Jesus. 

It is also important to remember when looking at this passage to recognize what Jesus said and not look at what may be implied. Jesus says "Mary has chosen the good portion..." He never says that Martha picked the "bad portion" only that Mary picked the "good portion". It's almost like the better of the two. It is important to sit at the feet of Jesus, but there is work to be done too. If we only sit at the feet, nothing will ever get done. There has to be a good balance of the two. The danger zone of serving is where Martha is. The bible says "But Martha was distracted with much serving." She didn't have that balance. She was working her fingers to the bone and forgetting that King of kings was sitting in her living room. It is important to sit and learn from Jesus and then get up and serve. Be with Jesus first and then get out there and do what He is calling you to do for His Kingdom.

that little prayer thing

I overheard a worship leader say (sarcastically), "after the little prayer thing we do" we will go into the next song. Hearing it just thrown out there like that, without a sense of realization of the way it sounded, threw me for a loop. To this I sarcastically responded "Oh yeah, you know, that little prayer thing where we communicate with the Creator of the universe and He actually stops and listens. Yeah let's just breeze right by that and get back to playing music!"

But sadly this is how American church culture thinks. We focus more on the worship music than we do the One we worship. We plan big events and do what we can to get people there instead of praying that God would bring increase. We make strategies to get to know people so we can talk to them about Jesus instead of talking to the people that are already in our lives that need Him.

I'm not saying that we shouldn't be prepared or doing what we can, but the thing that we lack the most is prayerfully considering God and His faithfulness. We live in a world that does not feel a need for God like many 3rd world countries do. Majority of people have enough food, enough money to get us by, a home to shelter us from the weather, and we are free to attend church without the threat of persecution. Having all of this threatens to give us a false sense of security in our lives. We forget that God has called us to "pray without ceasing" 1 Thess. 5:17.

At the beginning of the Grammy's this year, host LL Cool J began the night with a short prayer to acknowledge the sudden passing of Whitney Houston. As the camera panned across the crowd of celebrities with heads bowed and eyes closed I was shocked. Even the crowd of celebrities that are not known for their faith in God understand the power of prayer, even just to commemorate a fallen comrade.

A friend's blog provided me with a great example for this. I have never really been able to accurately put words to this phenomenon of a Christian's prayer life falling by the wayside. She likened a lack of prayer to having the Queen of England over for tea. Would you just go about your daily routine and leave the queen and all her royalty sitting alone in your kitchen. Maybe say a few words as you fly past her with laundry filled arms on your way to the basement. The Queen of England is important, but she is nothing compared to the Creator of the universe. He trumps her by a long shot!

Have you spent some time with HIM today?