ALMOST everyone is doing it

 I ran across a blog on CNN about the new trend in unmarried Christians. It's not really a new trend, we've seen it all along, but now people are broadcasting it. It is the sad fact that unmarried Christians are now reportedly having as much premarital sex as non-Christians.

What happened to "True love waits" or purity pledges that actually made a difference in how people acted behind closed doors?

It is no surprise that while premarital sex is on the rise, marriages are crumbling because of sexual sin, more kids are being raised by single parents than ever before and divorce for any reason is so high that it makes people question marriage in the first place.

God has called us to live above that. I know that it is not easy, trust me, I know. But it is not impossible.

http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2011/09/27/why-young-christians-arent-waiting-anymore/

Contentment

Lately i have been surrounded by talks of contentment as well as talks that causes my contentment to waver. For a good portion of the past 6 months i was learning more and more about relationships, dating, marriage and all that good stuff. And while it is "good stuff" it can also be harmful if i don't check my heart and desires and remind myself that there will come a time when that information is useful, but that may not be right now and that is okay. Today i listened to a podcast by Ben Stuart entitled "Contentment" and it was a great reminder of what i need to focus on right now.

"The default settings for many of our hearts is discontent"

Philippians 4:11-13

"I have learned how to be content/self-sufficient" - Paul it did not depend on his circumstances in life to be content, he learned to depend on God completely.

It's a command for Christians to be content. Godliness with contentment is great gain.

Guys don't want Barbie who is not ok without the dream home and convertible. They want someone who is going to be content for better and for worse and for richer or poorer. Girls want this type of person too. They don't want a guy who is so caught up in getting more that they work 80 hours a week because they have to get more of the things that they want. Girls want a man who is content with what they have and will be there emotionally and physically, and not always at work.

Contentment is really hard! Our world teaches that more is better. I think back to a show I watched occasionally when I was younger. "My Super Sweet Sixteen" was on MTV for a long period of time and followed a young person who was planning an over the top, elaborate sweet 16 birthday party. These parties generally included a huge venue, special catering, a larger than life cake, some famous performer, extravagant gowns or tuxes, and generally some kind of really expensive car as one of many gifts.

I remember one episode where the girl flew to Paris to pick out 2 or 3 different outfits for her various outfit changes throughout the night and had a very famous artist performing at the party. When it came time for the unveiling of her gifts, her parents led her outside and there was her brand new car. It was a nicer car than I will ever even have the opportunity to sit in, let alone own. Her reaction is what got me though. She was mad because it was not the one that she wanted. Through her tears she cursed at her parents for not giving her exactly what she wanted. I was stunned watching that.

Even with the most extravagant party and outfits and gifts, she still wasn't content. Instead she disrespected her parents in front of all of her friends and on national television.

Is there something in your life that you have not been content with or grateful for that God has given you? I encourage you to take it to God and express what you are feeling and ask for forgiveness.

here goes nothing

I have been toying with the idea of writing a book for quite some time now. But I haven't done it yet. When people ask me why I haven't written it yet I have a variety of excuses that I use, depending on who is asking.

If it's my parents I say, I'm too busy right now. If it's my friends I say, I have had other things on my plate and the idea has been pushing to the back burner. If it's a guy that I am interested in I say, I am not in that headspace any more. If it's someone that has heard me say that I will probably be single until I write this book I say, I haven't had any inspiration.

All of these answers are grounded in some truth. But the whole truth is that I am TERRIFIED to write it! I am terrified that it won't be any good and I'll be mocked relentlessly by the people that I know. I'm terrified that it will be good. I'm terrified to be rejected by countless publishers. I'm terrified of the recognition I could get. Just all around scared!

So maybe I will start out by writing some of my ideas here and get them out of my head and into cyberspace, just to see how they go over.

Blogging always seems like an easier forum to express your innermost thoughts and feelings.

So here goes nothing:

I am a single girl in my 20s, and for the most part I am ok with that label. I definitely have my ups and downs, but I enjoy my life right now. That is not to say that I want to be single my entire life. Actually, I would love to get married, have some kids and be a stay-at-home mom and home school my kids. But for now, I am in the exact place that God wants me and I am trying to embrace that and learn as much as possible while I am here. The way I see it, while I am here I may as well be useful! In order to be useful, I help at my local church as much as possible. I volunteer with the youth group and love on as many middle school and high school kids as possible with the love of Christ. I help in the nursery every week. I am active in the young singles group. And I help with as much as I can. I'm not telling you this to magnify how great I am, just to say that I am a busy girl! And to show you that there are plenty of ways to get involved at church.

I have always felt a little out of place at church though. Don't get me wrong, I love my church and the people there, but church is difficult for singles. For one thing, where do you sit? If your family doesn't attend the same church, or doesn't go at all, things are even more uncomfortable. But if you have a group of equally single friends, that makes things a little easier. And then there are the fears that everyone in the church will recognize that you are all single. There is nothing worse than when the older, happily married women of the church come by during the welcome time and shake your hand with that sympathetic look in their eyes. That is when you know they are racking their brains for some distant nephew or friend of a friend of a friends' son that they can set you up with.

Sometimes I want to scream "I am trying to be content over here and your sympathetic smiles and seemingly kind words of 'I'm sure he's out there sweetie, don't you worry' are making it that much harder!" They have good intentions, but I wish they would stop.